The Meeting Place

Hope you all had a great New Years. We are all looking forward to an awesome year at TMP. We hope to see everyone out at lots of parties and having a great time. Since we are in the New Year I just wanted to take a moment to remind everyone of a few things.

Don't forget to check out the Calendar here for all of our upcoming events. We have a theme or game or something every Saturday. We also welcome your suggestions, there is a suggestion box at the club, or you can also e-mail we_swing_4_fun_in@yahoo.com and leave your suggestions there.

The Friday special is going over so well, we will be keeping that going for awhile. If you want to come both Friday and Saturday night, you can pay for the whole weekend on Friday and pay only Saturday's price.

Singles, there have been some changes to the singles policy for both the ladies and gentlemen. If you are a single please read the singles policy in the links section here on the blog.

Membership cards, we still have some people who are coming in without their cards. Membership card must be shown at the door every time you come into a party. If you do not have your card we will gladly replace it for you, but you will have to pay for a new membership. Membership is a yearly fee, and we do not keep records other than the card you are given as to who has or hasn't paid for their membership, so please remember to bring your card along with you. We apologize for not remembering whose we have or haven't seen recently, but we have so many members that it is impossible to remember everyone, so please don't be offended if we ask to see your card.

Lockers are only to be kept by members who attend parties at the club at least twice a month. If you are there less than twice a month and leave a lock on a locker at the club, the lock will be removed and the contents placed in the lost and found. We keep a list of who belongs in which locker, and any locks left behind without letting a staff member know you are doing so, will be cut off. If you do attend at least 2 parties a month and wish to keep a locker please let a staff member know the locker number and your name(s) so it can be added to the list as an approved lock.

Please also remember that The Meeting Place is also Phyllis' home and everyone should treat it as such. The staff at the club are only volunteers, we go home just like the rest of you to real jobs and families and we really do appreciate everyone who cleans up after themselves. If you do see something that needs attention, please at least let a staff member know, don't leave it for someone to come across by mistake. We do ask that everyone leave the club by 11:00 a.m. after a party so the staff has a chance to go through and clean, and still have time left in their days to take care of their needs at home. If your unsure of who is a staff member, they are easily identified by the name badges they wear, just look for members wearing clear plastic name tags.

While the club is BYOB, and you are welcome to spend the night, encouraged in fact if you are drinking, please drink in moderation. Excessive use of alcohol only leads to problems and complications. What fun is it to drink until your sick or pass out? Not much for anyone, so please drink responsibly.

Please also remember our number 1 rule, no means no. This is for everyone not just the gentlemen. Ladies please respect the men as well when they say no, you would expect them to respect you. Be courteous to people, ask permission before joining in or touching anyone, and if they say no be understanding. Everyone has different comfort levels, and we want everyone to have a good time and be comfortable doing so. Don't take a no personally, it may just not have been a good time for what ever reason. Again if your having a problem please let a staff member know, we can't do anything about a problem if we don't know or find out weeks or months later.
With all that being said, we are looking forward to a great year at TMP. We have lots of fun events planned, and our hope is that all of you will come out and just spend some weekends enjoying yourselves. TMP above all else is a social club, and we have some of the greatest members around. There have been a lot of great friendships formed there over the years and I am sure many many more to come.

So Happy New Year Everyone!
See you at the club soon
Trish

Labels: FAQ

Many new couples seem to think that attending a party at a swingers club is a big orgy from one end to the other and that there will be pressure to participate. I hear this over and over when new couples come through the door for the first time. So I wanted to take a few moments to tell everyone what TMP (The Meeting Place) and the majority of swingers clubs are like.

First at TMP when you come in it looks very much like a house, it is a house except there is 14 bedrooms and what most call a very large bar area. Coming to TMP is much like going out to any night club, well except it is BYOB. The bar area has tables and chairs and a dance floor. There's a big pop cooler to keep your cold things in and a pop machine to add to your drinks. Most people use this area to simply meet people. They dance, talk, laugh and joke around. There may be a few playful things that go on here but for the most part it's pretty tame.

There is never pressure to do anything at any time that makes you uncomfortable. People wear what they are comfortable wearing, if you prefer to stay in your jeans and sweater all night and just hang out and meet people that is a fine way to go. Some people do dress down into lingerie, and all types of it. The ladies I would say mainly wear a chemise type nightie, but there are some that are more adventurous and get into the fun teddies and other skimpy outfits, there may even be a few who prefer being topless or naked. It's all a matter of comfort. For the men, boxers and T-shirts seem to be the majority rules clothing of choice, but there are some who go as far as the cute G-strings, and some just to a pair of lounge pants and t-shirt.

It's all about you and what makes you comfortable, don't feel because someone else goes and dresses down that you have to. You move at your own pace and should feel comfortable doing so. We have plenty of couple who do just come to meet other open minded adults. We do ask that if you want to go upstairs into the play area that you dress down. This again is to your comfort level, what ever form of night wear you are most comfortable in, that's fine with us. We ask that you wear slippers or flip flops or something along those lines and not street shoes, there's a lot of bare feet up there and getting stepped on by shoes hurts.

Ok now that's we've covered the clothing issue, let's move into other things. When it comes to playing that is completely your choice. The swingers lifestyle has many forms within itself. There are full swap couples, meaning they swap partners completely. There are soft swap couples, these couples may only swap for foreplay, or oral sex, but when it comes to actual intercourse they go back to their partners. There are couples that come simply because they like to watch and be watched. Then there are even others who are simply open minded enough to want to meet other open minded people and spend the night making friend for possible future encounters. There are couples that only play together, and those that only play apart. There are bi women and men, and straight women and men. There are those women who enjoy gang bangs, and couples who enjoy a good old fashioned orgy. There are couples who are just looking for a single female or male. These are things you and your partner should discuss before hand. Decide what things you would like to try, and what things you absolutely want to stay away from. If you decide that during you first time at a club you are only there to observe and meet people, stick to that. Come out, hang around, talk with couples, get a feel for the place, and then head home to discuss it. Any and all forms of that list above are acceptable. It's all about you and your comfort levels.

We always try and tell new couples to discuss your limits. This lifestyle works when communication is good. You must be able to tell each other what it is your looking for and decide what your rules are. This goes for going to a club or just meeting a couple outside of a club situation. Discuss everything, from condom use to how far either of you are willing to go and let your partner go. Make sure things are clear between you before meeting anyone or attending any parties. That's a sure way to make sure you will not have problems with your partner later.
If you go to a club, and you have your set rules, don't change them half way through the night. Go home discuss it first, and then decide if you want to change things. We say things sometimes because we're excited and then later regret changing it, or come to find out our partner was just too uncomfortable to state their case in the situation. This is where a lot of couples run into problems. So if you have a rule about not playing the first time you go to a club, don't suddenly decide through the night you are both comfortable enough to do so now that you've actually gotten there and met a few people. Wait go home and if you are both still in agreement after you've had a chance to discuss it outside of the club, then change your rules then, and come back again to another party.

I haven't heard a lot of men complain about this one, so I am going to put this out there for the women. A lot of women, myself included when I was new, think because you are at a club and you are putting yourself out there so to speak, that it's ok for anyone to touch you and you really can't say anything about it. This is so NOT the case. It is your body and you get to decide who can or can't touch or anything else for that matter. Just because you let someone do something once this also doesn't mean they should just assume it's ok again. There should be a level of respect there. Do not let yourself be pressured by anyone, your partner included to do anything that you may possibly feel regret over later. Life is too short to have regrets, if your uncomfortable speak up, don't stay silent and deal with it later. If someone does do something or goes to do something you just aren't comfortable with say NO. It is ok to say no, I will repeat that, it is very ok to say NO. I know Phyllis (the club owner) and myself try very hard to make sure all ladies know that for a fact. If you are uncomfortable saying no, work some sort of signal out with your partner ahead of time so they can say no for you. You do need to learn to be a bit brave here though and say no for yourself, it is very empowering, learning to say no or yes what ever the case may be. It really is your choice, and you shouldn't let someone else make it for you.

For all new couples, clubs can be intimidating. Your nervous as heck, your afraid of rejection, and your scared that others won't talk to you. We all know this, everyone who is in that room with you at some point was there for a first time. Nervousness and fear are quite common, and almost every new couple has some at a certain level. This is totally normal. A club is only going to be what you make of it though, if you come in and sit off by yourselves and don't at least try and meet people, you probably won't have a very good time. Our club has a staff of 13 members, most of whom are there on any given night. We also have a theme or event every Saturday night to try and help people get acquainted. If you are really having a hard time of it, and just can't seem to break out of your shell a little. Find a staff member, let them know your having a problem, we're used to helping new couples get through first night jitters. When going through a tour, our host couples invite new couples to sit with them, take them up on that offer. They will help introduce you to other club members. Get out on the dance floor, participate in the game or event. We do our best to try and make sure everyone is having a good time, but there are times when we are busy and don't get to everyone, so please let us know if you are really just having a hard time meeting people. Our club has enough members who come on a regular basis who we know would be more than happy to sit and help out a new couple and introduce them around.

So what sets TMP apart from other clubs, well for one it's so much more like going to a party at a friends house than it is a club. Dave and I have attended a few other clubs, we chose TMP because the people there were real. Everyone was friendly, you weren't judged on appearance, or finances, or color. It's just a group of real people who work hard all week and want a place to let off some steam over the weekend. TMP is much like going to any local bar, we all think of Cheers when we think of TMP. It really is a place to just be yourself, unwind and make some great friends. Anything else is a bonus.

I hope this post set some fear to rest for some people. I know going to a club was very intimidating for me personally, I was absolutely terrified. I was curious though at the same time, and after my second visit to TMP I realized that it really was a nice place to hang out. Most people who know me would never know I was one of those couples who sat off in the back table in the room and kept to myself. I was extremely quiet and shy and wasn't going to put myself out there for anything. There happened to be a couple at the club on our second visit who just asked us to sit with them, we did and the rest is pretty much history. It was that night I realized that I could just go and meet people and I didn't need to feel pressured to do anything I didn't want to do. It took me a little while longer to learn it was ok for me to say no when I felt uncomfortable, which is why I always tell women they can say no at any time for any reason, and they don't have to share that reason if they don't want to. The words no should be enough for anyone. So where I was once shy and timid, I am now more confident and self assured. I love being part of a wonderful place like TMP. I have made some of the best friends in my life there and I love being there on the weekends, which is why I take the time writing for this page as well as volunteering my time at the club. The Meeting Place is a special place, and it is so because of it's people and it's owner.

I hope this post helps even just one couple with their fears of clubs. One last piece of advice, if you attend a club and your first experience isn't great give it another chance on another night. If after your second of third time there you still don't feel like this is a place you'd like to visit again, try another club, give it the same opportunity. All clubs have a different atmosphere and feel to them, and because the crowd constantly changes so does the attitude a little, so don't be so quick to give up if you didn't have a fantastic night your first time. Sometimes it could just be your nerves, or maybe it was just an off night. What ever the case, give it more than one chance you might just be really glad you did, I know I am.

Trish

Labels: FAQ, swing club, swingers club, swingers help, swingers lifestyle

February 17th Mardi Gras - Ladies.....Come out and get your beads, how do you get them.....Well ladies just like New Orleans on Fat Tuesday....You earn them. How? That's up to the gentlemen...All of our guys are given beads at the door....And the lady with the most at the end of the night is proclaimed the winner. There may even be a prize. Guys we've been asked a couple of times now if it's ok for you to bring your own beads along as well to give out, and the answer is absolutely yes, we will count those beads as well for the ladies.

February 24th Sports Night- Ok everyone should be participating in this one, this is an easy dress up theme. Come wearing your favorite sports apparel. We decided it was time we had a dress up theme the guys could even get into. Ladies no reason why sports can't still be sexy. We also decided that since sports will be the theme of the evening this would be a great time to do a TMP Sexy Olympics, so we have some sexy, sporty games planned for all of you to play and get to know one another better. We know there will be a Dicky Ring Toss, and a sexy relay and some other great things as well.

March 3rd Beach Party - Come wearing your favorite Beach attire, by this time of year most of us are so tired of winter, a night of fun in the sun, even if it is pretend will be very welcomed. We'll be doing the Limbo and tossing around the beach balls, so come out and have a good time.

March 10th Hooker Night - This is always a really popular game night at TMP, all of our gentlemen are given a set amount of cash at the door that they can spend on our ladies as they see fit. The lady who had earned the most by the end of the game is declared our top lady of the evening.

March 17th St. Pat's Party - The Wearing of the Green, even those of you who aren't Irish can be Irish this one day of the year, but make sure your wearing green, we may have some pinchers in the crowd. We discussed this whole wearing of the green thing and decided we're all kind of tired of green usually by this day, so how about the wearing of the Orange, orange is an Irish color too and so under-rated.

March 24th Gigilo Night - Ok Guys this is your turn to earn the money from the ladies. Our last Gigilo night got the ladies going really good, and we loved spending that play money. This time we've heard you all talking and there's been some challenges made, so the ladies are expecting you all to come through for them. So come on out and show off a little and earn some of that play money, who will be crowned King Gigilo is up to you ladies.

March 31st Leather and Lace Night - This is a dress up theme everyone can get into. Wear your prettiest lace or your sexiest leather and come out for a night of fun.


April 7th Pretty Panties and Funny Boxers - This is another dress up theme, for the ladies wear your prettiest panties ( the DJ is partial to boys shorts for anyone interested) For the Guys bring out those funny boxers, we know you all have them.

April 14 Human BINGO - This is a new one we're trying out at TMP. Everyone will be given Bingo cards, and compete to find people matching the descriptions on their cards (similar to the scavenger hunt for anyone whose played that) We will give you a BINGO pattern to complete and the one who gets BINGO first wins. We may play on several different cards depending on participation, and maybe even give out a prize or 2.

April 21st Hot Legs and Best Buns Competition - We will have a Hot Legs contest for the ladies, so break out those short skirts and your best heels and show off those sexy legs. For the Guys, this will be your turn to get wet, we will be having a Wet Buns competition, the guys with the best butt will be proclaimed our winner. Ladies will get to vote for the guys and guys for the ladies. We will crown our winners MS. Sexy Legs and Mr. Best Buns for the evening.

April 28th Sexy Pictionary - This has really become a club favorite. We play similar to the board game, except we use teams and of course adult terms. Each team picks a member to draw, that person comes up picks a term or word from the bowl and draws it while his or her team mates try and guess what they are drawing. This one usually get the whole club involved as well as a lot of laughs to go around, so come out and play a great game with us. For anyone who wants to practice there is a free rated G online version of this game, click here, or if you have a Yahoo ID you can play their version here.

May 5th Fiesta Night - In honor of Cinco de Mayo we will be having our own Fiesta night, feel free to dress for the theme. We will have some great Mexican munchies as well as a pinata ( even if it's not what you would call a traditional pinata) and some other goodies. So join us for a wonderful celebration.

May 12th Pole Dance Competition - The last time we did this competition we had some great dances and a whole lot of great sports, so we figured we'd try again. We got the newbies even up on the pole last time, as well as some very entertaining gentlemen, so let get everyone out and try the pole. I'm sure we can dig up some prizes for our best dancers.

May 19th Wet T-shirt Competition - Our last 2 were such big hits we decided we need to keep getting the ladies wet more often, besides we know you guys love it. Our last one we know a few people who really wanted to be there missed out because of bad weather, others of you braved the snow and cold anyway to get in on the competition, so we're looking at a really big turn out for this competition, all of the ladies have been really creative in cutting up those shirts we provide and making them as sexy as possible. So come on in and be prepared to get creative and get wet.

May 25th - 27th Memorial Day Weekend - Let's all bring in summer with a huge weekend long party at TMP. Phyllis throws the best parties in the Midwest, but our three day weekends are always just the most fun you can possibly have in one weekends time. We provide breakfast, lunch and dinner on both Saturday and Sunday nights, so you never even have to leave the club. If the weather is nice I'm sure we can have some more fun with water out in the yard, and even catch some sun on the decks. We will have special pricing available for the whole weekend, and as soon as that's all set up we will begin taking reservations. I will get more information posted as it becomes available so keep checking back for it.


Hope to see everyone out at some of these events, I will keep updating this post as future events become available. Remember you can also call the club to see what's going on. If you have questions or need a better explanation please don't hesitate to ask you can use the e-mail questions button to the right to e-mail any questions you may have. Remember the only stupid questions are the ones not asked. Please just don't ask about prizes, we usually don't decide on them until the night of the party, we have to keep some things a surprise.
Trish

Labels: FAQ, fun, games, swingers parties, themes